Hello, is this Mrs. Melinda Gates? Hi there! My name is... {click!}

Hi, Mel? This is Dave! Yeah, from high school! you know, back row, Mr Walters' Biology class? Yeah, I'm the one who booby-trapped your lab partner's frog during dissection week. I wonder if he's still picking frog out of his hair!

Listen, Mel. I wanted to ask you and the hubby about something. I've got this bit of a dare going with some mates from the UK, and I could use your help. I need to both burn a million pounds, AND pick up a McLaren P1. What do I mean by "burn" a million pounds? Oh, that's simple! We'll just put the whole amount of cash into a huge pile, pour some 100 proof rum over it, and set it ablaze, with some marshmallows, hot dogs, and maybe even some kebobs. It'll be a hell of a thing! ABSOLUTELY, you and Bill can come by to watch! In fact, I'll even let you two start the fire! After all, it's your money being sent up, so it's only fair! Well, what day would work for you? thursday night? No, I'm sorry. I'm tossing 500k in diamonds into an active volcano that evening. How about the following Monday? Yeah? Cool! Around 7PM? Great! I'll set it all up. Thanks, Mel! Love to the family!